Thanks for so lucidly unravelling another Gordian knot of woke BS. I'm repeatedly struck by your ability to state the obvious when the obvious wasn't so obvious before you stated it!
Love this - “Mankeeping,” then, seems to be largely a fabricated problem and one rooted in a belief that men should be more like women as well as a dislike of and resentment against men. This is precisely how the accusation of women being ‘high maintenance’ works too and how so much historical misogyny always has." When will humans realize that being a human being is high maintenance? One concept of development that would be particularly helpful in our own maintenance is differentiation. To be fully present for another human being in any intimate relationship, whether as a partner, spouse, parent, or close friend, is an honor and a privilege. And to do this as a differentiated adult is the only thing that makes it truly possible. The process of maturation is painstaking. It literally takes a lot of pain to achieve autonomy (in early childhood), individuation (from adolescence to young adulthood), and differentiation (in adulthood). Perhaps these stages prepare us as witnesses of our fellow humans and enable us to accept and celebrate differences rather than pathologize and berate. Thank you for another thoughtful piece.
You hit the nail on the head again. I think it is also important to realize that there are a whole lot of variations in any group (you do say this.) When it comes to men and women, I do think biological sex is real, as many progressives do, but there are in many cases variations in how people feel and expressive themselves. Many of us (myself included) don't really fit the roles in some ways or others. I've worked with kids for ages and have always presented the idea that everyone can be their own self while still being a boy or a girl, it's fine to be unique. There's an old kids' song on the topic that has the line, "Let's all be abnormal and act like ourselves." I've always liked that.
Thanks for so lucidly unravelling another Gordian knot of woke BS. I'm repeatedly struck by your ability to state the obvious when the obvious wasn't so obvious before you stated it!
Ooh, I love that! Thanks!
I second that. The devil has many of the best tunes - anger, outrage, hurt, confusion, desire etc - these tend to drown out the quiet voice of reason.
Love this - “Mankeeping,” then, seems to be largely a fabricated problem and one rooted in a belief that men should be more like women as well as a dislike of and resentment against men. This is precisely how the accusation of women being ‘high maintenance’ works too and how so much historical misogyny always has." When will humans realize that being a human being is high maintenance? One concept of development that would be particularly helpful in our own maintenance is differentiation. To be fully present for another human being in any intimate relationship, whether as a partner, spouse, parent, or close friend, is an honor and a privilege. And to do this as a differentiated adult is the only thing that makes it truly possible. The process of maturation is painstaking. It literally takes a lot of pain to achieve autonomy (in early childhood), individuation (from adolescence to young adulthood), and differentiation (in adulthood). Perhaps these stages prepare us as witnesses of our fellow humans and enable us to accept and celebrate differences rather than pathologize and berate. Thank you for another thoughtful piece.
We’re singing from the same song sheet.
Thank you, Helen. I couldn’t agree more.
If calling women high maintenance is misogynistic then man keeping is misandrist. Let’s call it what it is.
Easy labels just swing the problem over to the other side
You hit the nail on the head again. I think it is also important to realize that there are a whole lot of variations in any group (you do say this.) When it comes to men and women, I do think biological sex is real, as many progressives do, but there are in many cases variations in how people feel and expressive themselves. Many of us (myself included) don't really fit the roles in some ways or others. I've worked with kids for ages and have always presented the idea that everyone can be their own self while still being a boy or a girl, it's fine to be unique. There's an old kids' song on the topic that has the line, "Let's all be abnormal and act like ourselves." I've always liked that.