Sisterhood and Dysfunctional Family Dynamics
Sisterhood and Dysfunctional Family Dynamics
Personal reflection on the feminism wars.
Today, Lyn, “a feminist who cares about young people, and truth” commented on my last post. In it, she said,
I always enjoy a good piece on Feminist theory. But it has its limits and is a luxury for most women. I gave up long ago deciding which philosophical Feminist camp I'm in. Sisterhood is the essence for me.
I like this identification of “sisterhood” as the essence of feminism. It is the concept which drew me to the movement too. Lyn is also correct that most women who care about women do not have the time (or often the inclination) to read vast amounts of writing on feminist theory and place themselves within a school of thought. The tendency of the feminist movement (as with so many movements) to separate itself into factions and then dedicate a significant amount energy to arguing with each other is also a problem. In addition to this, as we keep seeing, the vast majority of women (and men) want equality for women but only a minority identify as feminists.
Clearly, feminism is not universally understood as the aim for equality of the sexes. It has collected too much additional ideological baggage that is not accepted by very many people who support the equal rights of women and men.
I am a woman who is very interested in reading, thinking and writing about different philosophical, ideological and political movements. (You may have noticed). I am very much driven by the principles of liberal humanism. Consequently, I care about the rights and freedoms of everybody and aim to apply my liberal principles consistently across all demographics and ideological groups and I evaluate and then respect/like/love people as individuals. I also have a special bond with and interest in the experiences of my own sex which I do not believe detracts from that, just as a woman having a special connection with her sister does not usually prevent her from caring about anybody else or forming other meaningful relationships. If it does, something has gone wrong in that relationship dynamic.
“Sisterhood” then, I believe, is a good way to conceptualise a healthy dynamic of women caring about and supporting other women and to recognise when relationship dynamics between different kinds of feminists or women who care about other women are not healthy. I do not betray the bond of sisterhood by not agreeing with one (subset) of my sisters about everything. If, however, she responds to my disagreement by saying things like “You’re too fat and ugly to have to worry about being raped” or otherwise trying to bully me into submission, she has betrayed that bond with me. Giving in to her demands for compliance or responding to her in kind would be to enable a highly dysfunctional & abusive family dynamic which is something I am not prepared to do. Instead, I will have to tell her that my commitment to our bond of sisterhood and to her well-being and interests has not changed, but until she stops behaving abusively and domineeringly to me, we will not be able to have a relationship. (Also, if she would stop abusing and denigrating those of our brothers who have our interests very much at heart, that would be nice)
Bravo!
Ironically the "purity" and "virtue" signaling language wars that characterize - "woke" ideology - are also found in many other movements along with feminism. As a once active member of the anti-war Central American Solidarity movement during the 1990's the common virtue signaling within my circle revolved around what could be called the - "more radical than thou" - demonstrations of one's - "purity" of heart. As in - "if the rest of you aren't willing to chain yourself to the fence at the military base and go to prison for it" - "you aren't REAL anti-war activists." In the anti-war movement one was never sure whether those who espoused such positions - which often poisonously divided and splintered groups - where genuine in their beliefs - or if they were the inevitable government agent-provocateurs whose job it was to literally sew such discord.
In the end I came to the conclusion that it didn't really matter which was which - what mattered was that - BOTH types - poisoned group solidarity and morale. I find myself wondering to what extent government agent-provocateurs might be playing a similar role in efforts to undermine the solidarity of the gender-critical movement. I say this because clearly gender-ideology itself is being imposed from the top down on the populace by all the structures and institutions of Western society as a seeming preoccupation of oligarchy - and as quite likely tied to their trans-humanist agenda for their future techno "utopia" - sans the rest of us.